Hello everyone, and welcome to this week's installment of "The Offseason of DD". As has been stated, this will be a random post that has nothing to do with anything in particular, just something completely dumb I decided to come up with on a whim. You can find parts 1 and 2 here:
(DISCLAIMER: If you have never played Star Fox 64, or at least heard of the characters involved, you may not understand this post at all)
Today's fanpost revolves around a player who was on the Titans roster for a very short time in 2013, and is currently set to be a free agent. However, this player brought stability to a position that was ... well, terrible, under former Titans' Darius "Safety-against-Pittsburgh-and-a-shit-ton-of-other-mistakes" Reynaud and Devon "You-had-one-job-Wiggles-but-you-blew-it-in-one-game-against-the-Colts" Wiley. (Note: The position was also filled for a brief time by free-agent-to-be Damian Williams, but due to injury we leave his results at return-man as "incomplete")
If you haven't figured it out by now, yes, we will be talking about
LeBron James The Great Leon, also known as Leon Washington.
It is amazing when you think about it how Leon Washington even started playing football in the first place. The Great Leon went to college at Florida State University, where he majored in Intergalactic Combat and War Prep, and graduated with a 3.99 GPA.
Upon graduation from Florida State, he was immediately recruited by the likes of NASA, Star Fleet, and the Galactic Republic. These opportunities enticed Leon, but he was really waiting for that one offer upon submitting his resume and application - to join Star Fox and protect the Lylat System. One day he received a call from General Peppy Hare, but he did not receive the news he was waiting for so anxiously. Peppy told him that he had an outstanding resume, but Star Fox was not looking to add any members at the current time.
Leon was sad, but not completely discouraged. He decided to take a job offer from Star Fleet and sat aboard the USS Enterprise.
While Leon enjoyed this job, it wasn't what he wanted to do in life.
One day, while riding through the universes, Leon overheard some of his crew members talking about how Leon was rejected from Star Fox because Peppy said he "never did a barrel roll properly in his training at Florida State, therefore is unqualified to be a true member of Star Fox". This greatly angered Leon, so much so that he quit his job at Star Fleet and aimed to take revenge upon Star Fox for this indignation.
Notorious evil pilot person, Wolf O'Donnell, contacted Leon and gauged his interest in fighting on the side of evil against Star Fox and crew. Leon happily accepted this job. After a few intense months of training, and adding a few more members along the way, Star Wolf was born. The group dedicated solely to carrying out the wishes of the evil overlord of the Lylat System, Andross, as well as to destroy Star Fox.
Star Wolf set out to seek and destroy Star Fox. Leon was skilled in navigating through space and tracking people down, so after a short while, Star Wolf was able to track down the location of Star Fox. They dueled it out, and Star Fox was shocked to see Leon had joined the enemy. Leon seemed to have a personal grudge against Peppy, and single-handedly destroyed Peppy's ship in a matter of moments. But alas, Fox, Slippy, and Falco managed to defeat the 4 members of Star Wolf. Leon was, in a way, happy he defeated Peppy, but he wanted to see Star Fox as a team fall completely. Star Wolf trained harder, took the orders of Andross, and sought after Star Fox once last time.
The battle was intense, it came down to Fox and Falco vs Wolf and Leon. Fox had to chase after Andross, and after destroying Wolf, it was Falco vs Leon. The battle raged on, neither one wanting to give up. Leon had a few things to say about Falco.
Leon seemed to have the upper hand in this fight, but he made a huge mistake that spurred Falco's victory: Leon failed to do a proper barrel roll, just like Harry said. Falco took advantage of Leon's blunder, and subsequently destroyed Leon's ship. Star Wolf was defeated once and for all.
Leon managed to hitch a ride on a nearby ship, back to planet Earth. Leon decided to hang up the space wars outfit. He retired from Intergalatic Combat before NFL training camps began in 2013.
He decided to pursue a new career: Football. He had watched football on those really really long rides across many galaxies. He knew he was fast so he thought he'd fit in. The New England Patriots signed him for training camp, but was cut before the season. Owner Bob Kraft cited the fact that Leon's beliefs "conflicted with that of our organization, and did not mesh well with the Sith Lord, err, Bill Belicheck".
Leon was out of work until he received a call from the Tennessee Titans towards the end of 2013. He had finally found his home. Karl Klug in particular was happy with the signing, saying "I played Star Fox 64 when I was a kid, and stupid Peppy always got killed. I stand behind Leon and his beliefs."
Leon is now currently a free agent, and his beliefs regarding intergalactic combat may cause him to have difficulty finding a new team in 2014, unless of course the Titans bring him back. But the story of Leon Washington, The Great Leon, will live on for many light years to come.
Live long and prosper, O Great Leon.