Another Late Night with Ron Burgundy

Well my interview with an Anonymous-Jaguars-Fan-That-You-Just-Might-Recognize-At-A-Certain-Blog went over so well, that I decided to snag another exclusive interview (not that difficult to do when you're me, who doesn't want to be interviewed by Ron Burgundy?). This week, I am joined by Joe, one of the replacement refs who is subbing/scabbing in for the regulars while they hold out for more green. Join me as I talk to him about being an NFL referee and the way things have gone thus far in his NFL ref'ing career!

Ron: Joe, thanks for joining me.

Joe: *inaudible*

Ron: I think you may need to turn your mic on're also facing the wrong way, I'm over here.


Ron: I think my eardrum just exploded. Anyways, how does it feel to be officiating in the big leagues?

Joe: We're...we're...

Ron: It's a simple question Joe, no need to hesitate.

Joe: Hold on, I need to consult with the other guys...

Thirty minutes later...

Joe: It's been a lot of fun. Challenging, but I think we're all aware of the situation and doing the best that we can to maintain the integrity of the game. Right?

Ron: Who are you saying "Right?" to?

Joe: Oh, no one. I stand by what I said.

Ron: What's your officiating background?

Joe: Well I come from the AFAAF.

Ron: What's that?

Joe: The American Football Association of American Football.

Ron: That sounds..redundant. Who plays in that league?

Joe: Mainly former high schoolers who weren't good enough for their JV teams.

Ron: Ok then. So, how do you deal with the intense scrutiny and criticism that the replacement refs have received thus far?

Joe: Gamble.

Ron: What?!

Joe: Yeah, I place money on NFL games. Usually go for the underdog.

Ron: Joe, you know that is highly unethical and illegal for NFL employees right? You directly affect the outcome of the game.

Joe: Is it? I haven't read the rules, didn't know that.

Ron: You haven't read the rules for the league in which you are now an official?

Joe: I figured someone else would read them and I could just ask them what I need to do.

Ron: I'm going to pretend like the last few minutes never happened. What do you say to critics who say you are taking entirely too long to call things, or missing blatant fouls, or making huge mistakes that could affect who wins and who loses?

Joe: I've made a huge mistake.

Ron: You're admitting that?

Joe: After review, the previous statement is reversed.

Ron: Why, what evidence was there to reverse it?

Joe: It's what I saw on replay.

Ron: You suck!

Joe: Hold on, I need to confirm that...

Thirty minutes later...

Ron: I don't have time for this, I'm an anchorman dammit!

Ron leaves.

Joe: Delay of game...right?

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