The Tweeter Behind @FakeVinceYoung & @NotJeffFisher Floats a Titans' Conspiracy Theory

by Nonpopulist on Jan 2, 2011 11:47 AM CST

I'm the guy behind @FakeVinceYoung and @NotJeffFisher. I have a lot of fun tweeting from those accounts, but this idea doesn't really fit in a tweet so I thought I'd jot it down in the friendly confines of the Music City Miracles fanpost area. The Titans are a team who has struggled for national attention. They punch through once in a while and have their heads in the clouds of NFL buzzdom once in a bit, but look at how many primetime games they were scheduled for this season after the team had a 2,000 yard rusher. Was it 2 or 3? I've been drinking enough to ensure memory loss this season. I've got good news, though, Titans' fan. The drama surrounding the team now is painful and frustrating, but it the whole freaking world runs on drama nowadays, even the NFL. See for instance Brett Favre, the Cowboys being discussed incessantly this season despite sucking balls, and my wife watching Glee as I effeminately mouth the word drama until she throws things at me. Don't worry she's about as accurate as Vince-BURN!

This Fisher vs. Young drama is only going to help. It's a juicy storyline, and television executives looooooove drama. They are sexually aroused by it. When the situation in Nashville and after NFL schedules are finalized the people that schedule the nationally seen games will begin looking for storylines. Think of the possibilities. What if Vince and Coach Fisher have a meeting in the offseason a la the Pres. Obama beer summit? What if one of the two leaves the Titans and goes to another team and the Titans play that team next season? That game will get national consideration for sure. That leads me to my theory that explains all of the strife in Nashville and exonerates who I believe to be the real problem in Nashville, owner Bud Adams. My theory is...

Fisher, Vince Young, and Bud Adams played up the controversy to make a national story out of it. I'm talking about pro wrasslin' level faking it here, people. They are faking the whole thing to draw attention to Nashville so the team will get more recognition. This is the most convenient explanation that allows Titans' fans to sleep at night and for us to go on believing there aren't a bunch of idiots playing for, coaching, and running our football team. Hold onto it like a warm blanket, Titan fan. I have a feeling the offseason is going to be rough.

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I love those accounts.

Thanks for giving me a number of laughs this depressing season.

I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. And there's this awesome Chris Johnson Fathead over the wood paneling. Seriously, it's kind of a big deal...

by ronburgundy7427 on Jan 2, 2011 1:13 PM CST reply actions

thanks

Sploosh.
The Nonpopulist
FakeVinceYoung's Twitter account
NotJeffFisher's Twitter account

by Nonpopulist on Jan 2, 2011 2:30 PM CST up reply actions

I'm going to wrap myself in this lie like it's a warm blanket.

It should keep me warm all offseason.

"Do the Titans have a miracle left in them in what has been a magical season to this point? If they do, they need it now. Christie kicks it high and short. Gonna be fielded by Lorenzo Neal at the 25; he dishes it back to Wycheck; he throws it across the field to Dyson. 30, 40, 50, 40, 30, 20, 10, 5, endzone...touchdown, Titans! There are no flags on the field! It's a miracle! Tennessee has pulled a miracle! A miracle for the Titans!"

by TennesseeTyrants on Jan 2, 2011 5:32 PM CST reply actions 1 recs